KING CHARLES HIT BY BUS
The dangers of going outside. Even a king isn't safe. This is mostly to do with climate change.
King Charles revealed how he was blindsided by a double-decker as he cycled through Cambridge town centre in the 1960s.
“I had just finished a half bottle of gin at the Freemason’s Club and was attempting a right hand turn onto Coronation Street. Just then I was thrown quite suddenly across the road and onto the pavement. I was quite dazed. As I came to, I located my riding crop and went to reprimand the bus driver, but he was attempting to escape in his double-decker. I managed to grab hold of a doorhandle as he hurtled down the street. He dragged me quite a distance, but alas he got away. However, fortunately I was able to identify the bugger through his employer. It didn’t take us long to sort him out in quite a thorough manner.” said a contented King Charles. The king offered to show TGG the scars on his buttocks that he received so many years ago. We thanked him for the offer but felt that it wasn’t necessary.
King Charles life has indeed been a colourful one. Marriage to the beautiful Diana Spencer in 1981 ended before she eventually tragically smashed into a concrete wall in Paris in 1997 entirely coincidental to the prediction she outlined in her journal.
Then there was the controversial relationship with Jimmy Saville which saw Charles confide in the notorious nonce even to the point where he suggested appointing Saville as marriage counsellor to Diana and himself, and also contemplating making him godfather to Prince Harry. Then there’s Peter Ball, former Bishop of Gloucester who was convicted of child rape in 2015 but then got a nice place in the country thanks to Charles’ generosity. Lord Mountbatten, a cousin and great friend of Charlie’s also had a colourful history.
All in all it would seem that Charlie and the royals aren’t great at picking friends. Or avoiding buses.
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